Best (and/or Worst) Pick up Lines I’ve ever heard
To start our weekend off right, I offer these pick up lines
to all of you heading out for the evening trolling, uh, I mean, searching for
love. The following are old ones, new ones, cheesy ones, and groaners. At least
one should give you a good chuckle.
In no way, shape, or form do I recommend or condone the use
of any of the following pick up lines. Unless, of course, they work, then in
that case, it was all me.
Here we go, and good luck.
***
I lost my phone number. Can I borrow yours?
***
Hey, I got a question for you. What do you call twelve Ford F150s at a rock quarry?
I have no idea.
A pick up line that actually works.
***
Him: Bond. James
Bond.
Her: Off. Fuck
off.
***
You're absolutely gorgeous, and I'd like to think your inner
beauty is even more so. I'd like the chance to find out.
***
Hello. My name is Elmer J. Fudd. Millionaire. I own a
mansion and a yacht. (You have to be old enough to know where this line is
from, what voice to say it in, and are speaking to someone who is old enough to
understand the joke.)
***
What has 148 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk?
My zipper.
***
It's no use pretending to be a beautiful dumb blonde. I can tell you're a smart intelligent woman. (pause)
No, seriously, I'm a rocket scientist. I know these things.
***
Did you sit in a pile of sugar? ‘Cuz you have one sweet ass.
***
Let's talk about feelings. Emotions in beautiful women fascinate me. Right now I'm feeling very nervous. Say something to calm me down.
***
Even Nestle doesn’t make candy as sweet as you.
***
Bathsheba had nothing on you.
***
I was so caught up by your beauty, I ran into that wall over
there. So I’m gonna need your name and number for insurance purposes.
***
I’m Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me?
***
I own a car wash. Let’s get dirty.
***
Is that a sonic screwdriver in your pocket, or are you just
glad to see me?
***
You don’t have health insurance, do you? Because you have
got “fine” written all over you.
***
There’s something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn’t have
your number in it.
***
If I were to ask you out on a date, would your answer be the
same as the answer to this question?
***
Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten I see.
***
I’m writing a blog on the most beautiful things
I’ve seen. Mind if I interview you?
***
Are you a weeping angel? Because I haven’t blinked since I first
saw your face.
***
Do you have a band-aid? I scraped me knee falling for you.
***
Do you remember me? No? Oh that’s right! We’ve only met in
my dreams!
***
